The truth can sometimes hurt. It can also reveal a person’s true colors. Sometimes not on purpose but it’s something that sometimes needs to be done. It’s also something I’ve been trying to do with mixed results. Unfortunately, it’s probably doing more harm then good… For me anyway and here’s why. In my last few posts I wrote about lawsuits, dishonesty and social events. (Yeah makes for great soap opera episodes). Now I want to elaborate and make it an “All in One” extravaganza.
I did some thinking and it occurred to me that most people refuse to hear the truth even if they know that you are right. I don’t know why but this is what I have realized. Sure there can be reasons as to why but isn’t telling the truth the right thing to do? There are certain instances where covering up the truth is okay and in fact even acceptable but never ever use it as a weapon. The saying: “The truth shall set you free” may work but it depends on how you use it and when.
We have many singles events that have been happening in the last few weeks. Some even competing with each other on the same weekends. There are very honest promoters and organizers out there that will be straight up about the event while others will use deceptive means to get people to come. Sadly, those deceptive tactics are the ones that work. I don’t understand why people feel the need to lie about a weekend to entice people to come. It turns people off. I have been to a few of these. Some good. Some not.
About a year ago, I was “coerced” into going to one. with promises and reassurances made. As I expected, nothing promised was given. Just the opposite. Not surprised. Not only was I a fool but out of place as well. Keep in mind that this was a week after Sandy so the crowd turnout was poor. Lucky for me, someone I knew was there so I did what I felt was the right thing to do which was to confront the person in charge and let them know how I felt.
Fast forward to the aftermath: While I did mail the check, they claimed they never got it which I am very happy about. He/She insisted I write another one. Of course I wanted to know why I should pay for a service I never got.. Oh I did get threatened with small claims court (which was dropped because it couldn’t be proven that I was there). This went on for months and months when I found out that someone else that I knew had the same stunt pulled as well. And this isn’t the first time nor was it the last because you see every time there’s a singles weekend happening, this same person goes to nasty lengths to get people to come which I don’t understand because eventually people who show up will see for themselves and this is where the problem lies.
I try to be a good person and friend and somehow it seems to bite me in the ass. I know many people. I know people who run events. The honest ones are successful and will have big turnouts. The other ones won’t but will claim they are “sold out” even though it may not be true. The honest ones will limit the age group and be serious about it while the other will say one thing and mean something else . This what turns people off from ever going to future events (Will cover in a future post). People spend a lot of money to go away to these things and end up getting burned because of promoters who are just in it for the money and don’t care about the singles. (Sadly, there are a lot of these)
Because I’ve been one of them, I made it my mission to stand up to these “bullies” to protect my friends and other singles. Why? For the simple reason that I, and many others, are fed up with what goes on. Back in the day, promoters were honest and were willing to answer any concerns you might have. Here’s something you should know though: It seems that by trying to do the right thing you get punished for it and this is where the title of this post comes in.
As I said earlier, the truth hurts which is why no one wants to hear it. Sure you can deny all you want about what someone is saying and that’s fine but don’t make the person trying to help others have to suffer. The other factor is that you will have supporters and detractors. You will have people pressuring you to take posts down and others who will thank you in private. Then you have others who will use scare tactics to bully you and then you have others who will call you names. Say that your a liar and will make it a mission to let others know you are spreading lies to “destroy” them.
The thing is, people who run events have a reputation and image to maintain and when you cross that line that should never be crossed, that image begins to get questioned. In fact, when people do see for themselves that you (meaning the person trying to do the right thing) were in fact telling the truth all along they end up thanking you and regret not listening to you.
But then again, when your reputation isn’t good to begin with and there is history among others you need to ask yourself the following: Why am I going to this one when their are better ones out there? Why are these people still making events? Why is this place still open? Why is a crusader being punished for being open and honest? One person can make a difference. It can take months, years to do so but eventually when enough people go to these events and see that you were honest they will respect you for your honesty.
As I say on my Facebook, “My wall my posts. Don’t like it block me”. They do and I’m okay with that because this is is also a way to find out who your real friends really are. Those are the ones who stand by you at all times no matter what. If they feel that by these posts you are hurting them then so be it. I am not sorry for doing what I am doing. I’m proud of it. I won’t be bullied nor will I cave to the pressure. People don’t want the truth because they know you are right but for whatever reason won’t admit it. No, wait, I take that back. There could be many reasons and I won’t get into them instead, I will give you a clip from one of my favorite scenes from the movie A Few Good Men, which sums it up best why people don’t want to hear the truth.
- Honesty… doesn’t hurt as much… (vegaswizard.wordpress.com)
- When Did Honesty Leave? (lukevanley.wordpress.com)
- “The Truth About Lying” (gotblooms.org)
- Day 48: The Honest Person Is The Stupid Person (viktorpersson.com)
- Truth (ochobrazos.com)
- Speaking Truth = Living with Integrity (bernijourney.wordpress.com)